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A little bit of this and that :) but wholeheartedly me :)

Monday, September 12, 2011

A Suicide Note


T'is not as I had planned,
But t'is out of my hand,
The chords of life are cruel,
Pitting me in a constant duel
Where my chance of winning is none,
With each loss I'm further done!
Every step with pain is stained
Leaving me evermore drained!
I wished I could be more
And to my dreams do soar,
But to failure am I born
And to the end I sojourn
Lonely,hurt,crushed and in pain
With nothing to learn or gain.

Faretheewell cruel cruel life
I tire of every strife
And with a twist and a knot
I bid thee a goodbye nod...

Free at last so I think,
Standing on the brink
Of my last few moments
No more laments
I go,I go,I go,I go
But to where I do not know...

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Night




Neath the Moon's silver-tinted glow,

My sleepiness does grow.

My senses slowly dull,

My thoughts gradually lull.


Pitter-patter goes the rain,

Washing away my day's pain

While the lights all around

Within moments are no longer found.


Soon sweet darkness has it's way

And my mind begins to sway

Like the gentle rocking ocean

Clearing all my heart's emotion.


In the distance I hear a song

As if asking me to sing along;

But t'is only the night breeze,

Asking me to rest with gentle pleas.


Sweet,sweet sleep I come now,

And with one last gentle bow,

I bid this day a happy goodbye,

And rest now with a sweet sweet sigh.

The Last Flower



It was a beautiful summer evening in Staunton Park. The setting Sun was taking one last view at the town it had been watching over for years before resting for the night and leaving charge of the night to his good friend the Moon. The lake, which was in the middle of the park seemed to enjoy the last evening smile of the Sun and took great delight in highlighting the joy found on the his face to the only two people who were there that evening, Chris and Maggie. This was no ordinary evening one could tell simply from the atmosphere. The reddish tint of the Sun’s final few moments was amplified by the mirroring waters of the lake and the songs of the breeze who took great delight in the company of the trees and leaves and their harmonious song was enough to capture the minds of even the most distressed soul and give them peace.

However, there was no distress on the minds of Chris and Maggie. Married only a couple of months back, they were as happy and cheerful as anyone could be and the joy that these two shared can only be understood by one who knows what it’s like to have everything that they could ever want in this lifetime; such was their love and affection for one another.

As they were walking hand in hand along the path by the side of the lake, Maggie suddenly lifted her head, looked at Chris and asked, “Do you hear that, honey?”

Chris asked, “What? I didn’t hear anything sweetie.”

“Listen carefully; I think I hear someone singing!”

“You’re right, it’s coming from behind that huge tree over there,” Chris said, as he pointed to a tree right in the middle of the park. “C’mon lets go check it out.”

As they neared the tree, Maggie examined it and remarked, “Isn’t it strange, Chris, there’s a single flower on that tree, and it’s not even supposed to blossom this time of year!”

“That is rather queer, Maggie, I don’t know why, but I feel so heavy in my heart, like I could just weep for no reason.”

“I feel so too honey, it’s so strange.”

Suddenly a small old man appeared from behind the tree, and greeted Chris and Maggie.

“Hello there, it’s been so long since anyone has come to this park. It’s so nice to meet someone, I’m the caretaker and I must say I’m so glad you two came this way.”

“Hello,” Maggie replied “we’re just visiting this town to meet some relatives and wanted to take a walk. That’s why we came to this park coz we could see it from the inn where we’re staying. I must say I’m surprised there aren’t more people here, this is such a lovely place.”

“It is, isn’t it?” the old man replied, “but yes, it’s true not many people come here. This is a rather small town but everyone is so busy with their own work nobody has time to stop and admire Mother Nature’s beauty. There are also rumors going round that this park is haunted, and people generally avoid it, especially in the evenings.”

“Haunted?” Maggie asked, “how silly, but come to think of it we heard some strange singing as we were walking, that’s why we came near this tree.”

“My singing has been called a lot of things,” the old man smiled, “but that’s the first time I’ve heard someone call it strange.”

“That was you? I’m so sorry, I didn’t know,” Maggie blushed.

“That’s quite okay young lady, anyway I’m glad the two of you came, it’s been so long since I had company and I’m quite glad for it. I’m glad my ‘weird singing’ served a purpose. What do you think of this tree here?”

“Well it’s one of the biggest trees I’ve ever seen,” Chris replied “ and it’s strange that there’s a single flower when it’s not even supposed to be flowering yet, it’s not the season, and also when we came near it we felt a strange feeling of sadness, it’s quite odd really.”

“Not many people would have noticed the flower,” the old man smiled, “well done! And you felt sad you say?”

“Yes,” Maggie replied, “and we didn’t even know why but we just wanted to cry.”

“Well, it is a very old tree and they say it holds many secrets, not only secrets, but the tree has a wonderful yet really sad story to it, would you like to hear it?”

“By all means, we love stories,” the couple replied in unison.

“Excellent then, sit my down my dears and allow me to share what I know.”

“Now then my dearies, let us begin, once upon a time when the land was much younger and before this town was as big as it is now, this tree was still here but it was no ordinary tree. You see, there were once tiny men and tiny women, much smaller than us, who lived in this tree and Hobnobs were they called, magical beings they were. Very few people knew of them and even they that knew were unaware where they came from or how they came to be. They were a shy people and kept to themselves. They had a King and Queen to rule over them and as long as there was a King and there was a Queen, the Hobnobs were happy and had long healthy lives, free from sickness and despair. They took great delight in things that grow and it is said that this tree always had flowers no matter what time of the year it was, for the love and peace that the Hobnobs had in their hearts would make things all around grow and flourish and this tree which was their home was a picture of beauty and tranquility. Now the King and Queen had a daughter who they loved full well and it was almost time for her to marry and choose a husband who would then be King after her mother and father passed away, as thus had always been among the Hobnobs. The Princess, Esmeralda as she was called was a beautiful Hobnob, with rosy cheeks, long golden locks with a smile and a heart as radiant as the Sun. She was a loving and compassionate being who took great delight in the well-being of others and every Hobnob knew she would one day make a great Queen and looked forward to her rule. But one day, as she was out on the high branches of the tree, she saw a human boy come into the field and the boy tripped and hurt himself and started crying. The Princess watched and waited for someone to come to his aid but even after a long time no one came and comforted the boy for the boy was an orphan. Finally, after a long time, the boy picked himself up, cleaned his wound and limped back towards the town and the Princess was full of sorrow at this sight.

‘This human world is so sad,’ she said to herself ‘why do not they take care of each other as we do here?’ and with this thought she went back to the castle. That night she could not sleep, images of the crying boy filled her head and she could not stop weeping at this. When everyone was asleep, she got up and said to herself, ‘I must show the humans the true meaning of love and care, for I have no greater responsibility than this. Father and mother can find someone else to lead the people, for me it is clear that I have to go into the human world and teach them what it is like to care for others.’ With that she went to the library, took an old book on Hobnob magic and immediately started to cast a spell on herself which would change her into a human. A few minutes later, there was a flash and an explosion of bright light and she was gone, where to nobody knew at that time.

That morning, there was a great commotion in the castle. By then, the King and Queen as well as everybody other Hobnob had realized the Princess was gone, but where to nobody knew. The King sent every Hobnob to all parts of the tree, from the highest branch to the lowest root, but no one could find the Princess and everyone despaired. The King went into a deep depression and he was joined by her Queen and every Hobnob experienced sadness for the first time in their lives. You see, among the Hobnobs there was no sadness before this, not even in death because when a Hobnob died, he or she simply vanished. Their body was absorbed into the tree where they would become a flower and every Hobnob knew that every other Hobnob who died and became a flower would soon be reborn among them simply by a different name and a different body, but it was always the same Hobnob who was reborn and hence there was no grieving even in death. This is why they were called Hobnobs, which in the language of the olden days meant “Children of the Tree.” But at the disappearance of the Princess, things changed. There was now a flower which could never be reborn and no one knew what would happen. The whole tree mourned and for days no one could do a thing, until a young Hobnob by the name of Maric came to the castle. He was widely touted as being a clever, resourceful Hobnob who had a curiosity matched only by his quick wit. He looked around in the castle library and found the book on old magic the Princess had used. He immediately recognized the Princess had used it by the way it was placed upside down. He then alerted the King immediately and once the King and Queen and they saw the book, they fell down on their knees and wept. ‘By all that is holy do you know what this means?’ the King asked Maric. Maric replied in the negative. The King then explained to Maric, ‘This book teaches the shape shifting magic, the ability to change into a human. The poor Princess, she doesn’t know that whoever casts this spell on herself loses all memory. It must be cast by another and also the only way to change back is through a particular potion of which she has no knowledge of. Oh the poor foolish child, I’m afraid we’ve lost her forever.’

‘My King, we need not lose her forever, I, Maric your humble servant is willing to go after her and look for her in the human world with your permission.’

‘My child, I could not ask such a thing from you, it is too risky. We do not know if you could ever find her or if she would even be willing to come back. It is a fool’s errand.’

‘I would gladly be a fool for you, your Majesty, please, I beg of you, for your sake, for your Queen’s sake and for the people’s sake, let me go look for her. The people need you and want you to be happy and without Princess Esmeralda, you and your Queen never can be happy, so please let me take this quest, on behalf of every Hobnob, I beg you!’

‘Ah my child, such courage and dedication, thank you. Very well, I shall grant your request. But first, you must have the potion which can change you both back when you find her, this will take a while to prepare, as soon as it is ready then you shall go.’

‘Thank you, your Majesty.’

After a few hours, the potion was ready and preparations were made to send Maric to look for Princess Esmeralda. All was now ready except for the casting of the spell, which would be done by the King himself, so that Maric would not lose his memory as the Princess did. In front of every Hobnob, the King spoke his final words to Maric wishing him every success and good fortune followed by a huge cheer from every single Hobnob who saluted Maric’s bravery. Such an event had never occurred in the history of the Hobnobs. Though the shape shift spell had been there for ages, it had never been practiced before this, and now in the space of a short time, it was to be used for a second time. The spell was cast and then with a flash and an explosion of bright light, Maric was gone, and every Hobnob wondered if they would ever see him or the Princess again.

When Maric regained consciousness, he was lying in a field of green grass and when he opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was his former home. It was the first time he saw it from outside and he was amazed and proud at how beautiful it was. Being a practical Hobnob, he soon sprang to his feet and said to himself, ‘Well I want to get back home fast, and so I’d better start looking for the Princess. Ancestors guide me!’ With that he started to trudge towards the town but couldn’t help but turn back after every few seconds. He was already badly homesick but then the realization that all the Hobnobs were counting on him strengthened his resolve and he started to walk faster and very soon he was in the village.

Soon Maric entered the village and it was here that he truly realized the enormity of the task in front of him. There were people in the town than he had ever imagined and to find the Princess, who had no idea of her identity, was truly going to be a monumental task. He spent the whole day asking people if they had seen or heard of someone named Esmeralda and sadly for him, there was no one in town by that name. Having no human money, he slept in the streets that night and were it not for some kind souls who thought him a homeless beggar and offered him food, he would have starved. These kind souls also offered to give him food and shelter for as long as he needed and Maric was touched. He said he would accept the food but that he preferred to sleep in the streets. This way he could continue his search even at night. The whole night he searched again but to no avail. Exhausted, he collapsed at the break of dawn. It was during this time he had a dream. In his dream his mother appeared to him and reminded him that a Hobnob is born out of love and joy and will always spread this wherever he or she goes.

The next morning, the same family who had given him food the previous night caught up with him and offered him breakfast. Maric was deeply touched and thanked them profusely and also asked them why they were doing such a thing. The man, whose name was Henry told Maric, ‘My wife Sally and I have for many years tried to have a baby but we’ve never been able to. Just a few days ago, we met this young woman who seemed lost. We took her in and she had no idea who she was or where she’s from, so we’ve taken her in as our daughter. Ever since that day, we’ve been blessed with so much joy and happiness that we’ve tried our best to help out everyone we can. Everyone in the village has noticed this and is also starting to show each other kindness in ways like we never have before. It’s truly amazing and it’s all because of our daughter who we’ve named Amanda.’ Maric’s eyes grew wide as he heard this and immediately asked if he could meet Amanda. The couple happily obliged and took Maric home and introduced him to Amanda.

As soon as Maric laid eyes on Amanda he was sure as his next breath that it was none other than Princess Esmeralda. Henry and Sally then told Maric that they were off their fields but that he was welcome to stay at home and keep Amanda company. As soon as they were gone, Maric tried to tell Amanda about the Hobnobs and who she was but Amanda laughed it off. She said he was being silly and that he shouldn’t repay her parents’ kindness to him by trying to steal her away with lies. Maric didn’t know what to do and for the rest of the day he was deep in thought. Henry and Sally came back in the evening and asked Maric to stay for the night to which Maric agreed.

That night Maric had another dream. This time he saw his father who reminded him that Hobnobs are children of the tree and have the gift of making anything they plant grow and flourish in ways that no others can. He woke up in the morning, felt for his pocket and found some seeds there. He then had an idea. After breakfast, he suggested to Henry and Sally that he and Amanda would go into the fields and work that day while the couple stayed at home and rested. The family thought it to be a wonderful idea. Henry laughed out, ‘We ordinarily wouldn’t trust a stranger to go into the fields with our daughter alone. We don’t know why son, but we trust you so much, so go ahead. And thanks for giving our old bones a chance to rest.’

With that, Maric and Amanda left for the fields and once there he asked her how long it usually took seeds to grow into a fully grown tree. Amanda replied that it takes many years. Maric then said to Amanda, ‘I’m going to prove to you now that you’re really a Hobnob. Take these seeds and plant them here. Water it personally everyday for the next one week and see what happens. After this evening, I’m not coming back with you to town. I shall be in the field outside town, the one with the big tree and once you’re convinced that what I’ve told you is true, then come and meet me there. You can tell your parents I’ve left for my hometown. Don’t worry about me, I shall have fruits to eat there. I will go now and wait for you. Farewell for now.’

With that Maric left and Amanda thought to herself, ‘What a strange man! But I guess there’s no harm in granting his request. I shall water this seed like he said and see for myself.’ That evening she went home alone and as Maric requested she told her parents that Maric had left for home and with that they forgot about him.

Maric on his part waited and waited for weeks but still he saw no signs of Amanda and thought that she had forgotten about him. However, he knew there was nothing he could do. ‘Anyway, if that’s the life she chose, so be it. Henry and Sally are taking good care of her so perhaps it’s better for her.’ He however decided that he would not return without her and chose to remain behind in the human world. ‘After all, I can’t go back a failure and I shall not die of hunger so I shall take this exile as a punishment for my failure.’

After a month or so had passed one day he saw a young woman running towards the field and when he looked closer, it was Amanda. As soon as she saw him she exclaimed, ‘I’m so sorry, my parents and I went to the city to sell our crops and we were away. As soon as we came back I started watering your seed and within exactly one week it grew into a fully sized tree. My dad is still shocked and amazed and I don’t know how you did it, but what you said came true. Now I still don’t believe you about the Hobnob thing but I came to tell you that I hadn’t forgotten about you and wanted to tell you that I fulfilled your request of me. If there’s nothing else, I’ll go back to town now.’

Maric stared at Amanda then said, ‘There’s just one more thing I’d like to request of you. It is said that this tree carries the being of every Hobnob, even their memories, so I don’t know what will happen but please just touch this tree. Just put on a finger on it, please I beg you.’

‘Well there’s no harm in that I suppose,’ said Amanda and she put her right hand on the tree. Nothing happened. But then just as she was about to remove her hand, she started trembling! Then miraculously, in a few minutes she came to her senses and remembered everything. The joy in Esmeralda and Maric was such that words could not do justice. Esmeralda thanked Maric for coming for her and after Maric told her about the potion, she told him, ‘Greater love than this has no one ever shown. You came for me willing to sacrifice everything. You have shown love to me and our people and when we return, I shall have no one else as my husband. A more worthy ruler for our people will never be found aside from you.’

With that Maric gave her the potion and she took a sip. But yet again nothing happened! They were both shocked. ‘Perhaps we’ve been human too long that the potion is no longer effective,’ said Esmeralda, ‘then again perhaps it’s meant to be. If we can’t return, at least we still have each other and if you’ll have me, I’m willing to be your wife and live my life as a human with you beside me, Hobnob or not. I await your reply.’

‘Princess…’ stuttered Maric and just as he was about to say ‘yes’ to her, there was a flash and Esmeralda was gone. In his excitement Maric had forgotten what the King had told him; that it took a while for the potion to take effect. However to his great dismay, the remnant of the potion was now spilt all over the ground for it was still in Esmeralda’s hand when she changed back. Even greater was the sorrow for Esmeralda and Maric, for they were gone so long the King thought they had disappeared for good and while they were gone, the ancient magic book was destroyed so that it would never be used again and the spell was lost forever, and with it Maric’s chance to return to the Hobnobs.

It is said that Maric grew old and died of age as a human, while in the tree Esmeralda would not marry anyone else even after her mother and father died. Having no King on the throne, the Hobnobs all fell into a deep sleep and the flowers all disappeared, all except one. They say that the single flower is the spirit of Esmeralda waiting for her beloved Maric to return to her side and restore the Kingdom. The magic in the tree preserved Esmeralda but the same could not be said for Maric and his being was lost forever. However, should a couple of true heart and pure love shed tears for Maric, it is said his spirit will be able to find his way back to the tree but this has not happened till now and perhaps never will…and that is the end of my tale my dearies. I hope you enjoyed it.”

“What a beautiful tale,” cried Maggie wiping the tears from her eyes.

“I agree, it was a beautiful story,” Chris added.

“Chris, you aren’t crying, c’mon what’s wrong with you? It might save Maric,” Maggie cried.

“Sweetie, it’s just a story, I’m an author, I write stuff like that, I don’t cry over them.”

“Guess you’re right, sorry honey.”

“It’s all right sweetie.”

The old man then thanked them for listening to his tale and told them he would be going home for the night. He added, “Come back tomorrow if you want to hear more stories.”

With that they parted company and the couple went back to their room to retire for the night.

The next morning, Maggie suggested that since they had nothing else to do, they go visit the old man again and listen to more of his tales. Chris agreed.

Once they reached the park, they didn’t find the old man and looked around. The saw another person there and asked him where they could find the caretaker. The man replied, “I am the caretaker.”

Chris said, “There was another caretaker here, an old man, I’m sure you must’ve seen him.”

The man replied, “Sir, I’ve been working here for 10 years and I’m the only caretaker, I promise you, why would I lie?”

Confused, the couple approached the tree and to their great surprise, you would not believe it, it was covered with flowers; flowers of all colors, shapes and sizes. There were so many that the tree seemed weighed down, but even when a strong wind blew against it, no flowers fell; except two which glided down into the palms of Chris and Maggie. The couple just stared with their mouths open.

“Chris???” stuttered Maggie.

“Maggie, sweetie, I have a confession to make, last night I couldn’t sleep so I got up in the middle of the night and came here. I thought about the old man’s story and realized how much it would hurt me if I ever lost you like that and before I knew it, a single tear found its way down my cheek to the trunk of this tree!”

“Alas, thou sad sad tree,

There is yet hope for thee.

Hearts joined by truest of love

Have been sent from above.”