Men and Women

DISCLAIMER: The following note is written for the purpose of a few cheap laughs and not to be taken seriously. If you are offended by any of these, you're a douche bag and need to have a sense of humor surgically implanted. All males and females mentioned are stereotypical. Any resemblance to any real person, dead or alive, is unfortunate... for that person, but extremely funny for me. :P



As the title of a famous book by John Gray goes, "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus". It's abundantly clear that they are two separate entities from entirely different worlds, and hence the differences are bound to abound. Here are a few that this ogre has observed (with more and more additions to arrive in the coming months and years).

1. Women know that they think a lot, men on the other hand think they know a lot.

2. Nine times out of ten, a woman will be able to recall where she last placed the object she's looking for and find it still there; ten times out of ten, a man will think he remembers where he last placed that damned object, only to find it's miles away from where he thought it was, he then concludes the woman must have placed it there.

3. Women have understood the phrase "more skin is sexy" and are known to show off the right amount of skin to get things done at the right time; Men however have misunderstood the phrase and grow paunches (expand their skin) thinking that this somehow turns women on (we're talking average males here).

4. Women think that to please her man, they must dress well , but for a man a woman doesn't have to dress at all to please him.

5. Women have realized that scratching their asses in public is not socially acceptable behavior; Men, sadly, have not!

6. For a woman, the smaller the underwear, the more attractive it becomes to men; In the case of men, well let's leave it at that.

7. If a woman is able to do stuff that normally guys do really well, she's cool; A man who does stuff a woman does really well, not cool.

8. Women often lie to others to make them feel better, men just lie!

9. Women can say FOX without thinking of Megan Fox; men can't even send a fax without doing so.

10. Women can be nice to other men and women without any problems; if a man is nice to another man he's gay, if he's nice to another woman, he's a flirt.

11. Women around the world often hold each others' hands while walking in the streets; if you see two men holding hands and walking on the road, you must be in India,,,and if they hold pinkies, Mumbai [courtesy of Russell Peters hehe :)]

12. A woman can wear her boyfriend's clothes and still look good; a man can never, must never and should never wear his girlfriend's clothes...PERIOD!!!